So many questions this side of Heaven...

As I was sitting here by myself on this Tuesday night, Justin is at bible study and my sweet little ones are in their beds going to sleep, I've had just a few minutes to think about things and thought some of my thoughts were blog worthy...so here it is!  I don't watch the news anymore and if it isn't talked about in the accounting department at Davis & Floyd...I don't usually know what is going on in this world.  Plus, all my co-workers are 55 and older so their topics of interest on the news and my topics of interest aren't normally the same.  However...they do keep me somewhat informed.  It is hard to know what's going on in the world when all you watch is Barney, Charlotte's Web, Super Buddies, Brother Bear, The Blue Elephant...or any other kid movie on Netflix!  I wouldn't have it any other way though.  So, I'm sure by now...everyone has heard the tragic news of Robin Williams committing suicide.  I can't seem to grasp how anyone in life can be that desperate for an ending.  How can someone who has spent the majority of his life trying to bring joy and entertainment to so many be so sad??  How can someone who is so wealthy and probably had the best things in life be so empty??  I didn't know he had battled with addictions for a part of his life.  I guess I probably should have because that tends to be the norm for "Hollywood".  It just goes to show that wealth and fame aren't the things to long for in this world.  You can have the best clothes, or the nicest car, or the fanciest house...but all those things aren't going to bring you happiness!  They may for a while but then it just turns to more want!  It also just goes to show you never know what other people in this world are dealing with.  Just last week, a co-workers of mine's 29 year old cousin also took his life.  He was a graduate of North Greenville University.  He was married with an 18 month old son.  He worked for CPW, helped his father-in-law in his heating and cooling business, was a volunteer fireman, and also worked at the local YMCA.  He talked with his mom and dad everyday and was very close to his brother...even though he lives in another state.  Nothing in his life would have raised a flag that he was even considering this.  It happened on a Friday afternoon.  He had spoken with his mom and dad earlier and acted like everything was normal.  He told his boss that he needed to leave work early for a family emergency.  His wife had been at her mom's visiting that day with her sister and her sister's child.  She pulled in their driveway and heard the gun go off in the back yard.  Patsy, my co-worker, went to his parents house on Saturday and said all either of his parents would say is "Why didn't he talk to us?"  "What was so bad that he thought this was the only way out?"  I'm not even sure what you say to someone in this situation.  Is there hope for someone who commits suicide to go to Heaven??  I have always thought no that if you committed suicide there was no chance of heaven...until a message Jason preached years ago when a young girl in high school committed suicide.  Or maybe it was when Wade Burton, a lifelong follower of Christ, tried to overdose.  Either way...it was a message that had stuck with me.  He asked if we believed that one sinful act was enough to keep us out of heaven.  Of course it isn't or none of us would ever make it there.  There was only one perfect person to ever walk this earth!  So, that also brought up the question of well if you commit suicide you don't have a chance to ask for forgiveness of this sin.  But, how many of us sin everyday and don't ask for forgiveness right away?  What if something happened to us driving home... would that one sin we committed earlier in the day that we hadn't asked God's forgiveness for yet keep us from Heaven??  I don't believe so.  Now, what I do believe is that Christian's still sin, hopefully not to the extent of non-believers, but I believe God looks at your life as a whole.  What if Wade Burton's attempt had been successful??  Would all those years of preaching and drawing others to Christ be worthless because while he was at such a low point in his life, he made a bad decision?  I can't help but think no...that isn't how God works!  He is a loving God who forgives us and knows we don't always make the right choice.  Thank goodness we don't or what would we need Him for??    So, I do believe their is hope for some who make a permanent decision to what was probably a temporary problem.  I do believe Christians make mistakes too but if you are living like you should and doing the things God has called you to do that one bad decision isn't going to keep you out of Heaven!  There are so many questions we have that we would love for God to answer.  But...I heard someone say just last week...but when we get to Heaven those questions probably won't even matter anymore!  So, that is just my random rambling for this Tuesday night.  I just hope you all are living for Christ and trying to bring glory and honor to Him in all you say and do!  But I also hope you have reassurance that God knows we are going to make mistakes...but He often uses our mistakes for good!  Have a great night!